RWC: Pool B

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Australia

Why will they win it: Because, well, they're Australia. They think that they can win everything and everything, and they usually do.

Why they won’t win it: Because if Larkham get injured, they might as well get on a Contiki tour bus and see the rest of Europe. Also, one has to think that after years of drinking puppy blood and sacrificing kittens in a bid to keep his place in the team, karma surely has to bite George Gregan on the arse. Finally, you get the feeling that if they meet the All Blacks somewhere along the line, the AB's will hungry for some Wallaby stew after the last World Cup.

Most Likely to: Have a former Rugby League player sent home because he broke curfew and a fellow patrons nose.

Realistic Chances: The semis although my prediction is elimination in the quarters.

Little known fact: Matt Dunning moonlights as an artists muse at Sydney Uni.


Wales

Why will they win it: A fine tradition of Rugby, men's choirs and Charlotte Church.

Why they won’t win it: There are a number of reasons why the Welsh won't win the World Cup but above all they were recently thumped 65-5 by England. Yes, England. Also, Charlotte Church.

Most Likely to: Lose to one of the lesser teams. Fiji loom large for the Welsh, so do Japan quite frankly.

Realistic Chances: Third in group or maybe quarters. A win over Japan will see them singing in the Valleys however.

Little known fact: Wales once fielded a team containing only Jones' in a 24-12 loss to Japan in 1993.


Fiji

Why will they win it: Talent and flair to burn make this team very dangerous.

Why they won’t win it: Because as yet, scrums and lineout's are still a very important part of the game.

Most Likely to: Score a wonder try and have their entire squad poached by New Zealand S14 teams.

Realistic Chances: The quarters, but only if the Auckland Blues have not taken all their best players after the first game.

Little known fact: The Fiji squad contains the most syllables in the tournament.


Canada

Why will they win it: Tough, uncompromising lumberjacks and Monties. These boy's eat maple syrup for breakfast!

Why they won’t win it: Maple syrup is banned under EU trade laws and language difficulties for most of the squad.

Most Likely to: Have the only National Anthem at the World Cup where absolutely everybody know the first line: "Oh Canada...."

Realistic Chances: Forth in Group but will scare Australia on the way.

Little known fact: Prop, Rodd Snow's name was only slightly ironic.


Japan

Why will they win it: Because there is a chance that all the other teams will withdraw suddenly and for no apparent reason.

Why they won’t win it: Because all the enthusiasm in the World is still no substitute for a massive pack of forwards.

Most Likely to: Have the politest squad at the World Cup.

Realistic Chances: Slightly better than Namibia or Portugal but stone last in Pool A.

Little known fact: The 'Cherry Blossoms' used to be nicknamed the 'Killer Attack Ninja Roberts of Death' until political correctness went mad.